The Clog from OzStupid Warning Labels
October 23rd 2006 04:14
“Caution: Cape does not enable user to fly.” – Batman costume warning label
Ahhh.. you gotta love stupid warning labels. Although, this one may not be so stupid. When you were a kid, did you think it was possible to fly in a superhero’s cape? Well I certainly thought it was! I also thought it was possible to float down from the roof with an umbrella opened up – just like in Mary Poppins. When I was 8 my Dad crushed my dreams by saying I was too heavy to be supported by the little bit of air under the umbrella. That was a sad day...
Also, I once tried to convince my little sister that I had superpowers and could fly off a foot-high pile of bricks. Of course, since she was only 4 and I was 9, I was able to jump off it much further than her, which she naively mistook for flying. She was so cute when she was young and stupid!
Now back to funny product warning labels. I’m sure we’ve all heard random stupid or redundant labels that may or may not be true: On a Swedish chainsaw: “Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals” or on an American Airlines packet of nuts: Instructions: open packet, eat nuts. Noooo, you're kidding aren't you?
The M-Law Wacky Warning Label contest hands the grand prize over to a heat gun and paint remover that produces temperatures of 1,000 degrees Fahrenheit and warns users, “Do not use this tool as a hair dryer”.
As long as companies need to cover themselves from any lawsuits, like in the quote above, and as long as simple labels can be lost in translation (like the label on a Korean kitchen knife: “Warning: keep out of children”) – we will have stupid (but funny) warning labels. I’ll finish off with this absolutely ludicrous label that was found on an infant's bathtub:
”Do not throw baby out with bath water."
Ahhh.. you gotta love stupid warning labels. Although, this one may not be so stupid. When you were a kid, did you think it was possible to fly in a superhero’s cape? Well I certainly thought it was! I also thought it was possible to float down from the roof with an umbrella opened up – just like in Mary Poppins. When I was 8 my Dad crushed my dreams by saying I was too heavy to be supported by the little bit of air under the umbrella. That was a sad day...
Now back to funny product warning labels. I’m sure we’ve all heard random stupid or redundant labels that may or may not be true: On a Swedish chainsaw: “Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals” or on an American Airlines packet of nuts: Instructions: open packet, eat nuts. Noooo, you're kidding aren't you?
The M-Law Wacky Warning Label contest hands the grand prize over to a heat gun and paint remover that produces temperatures of 1,000 degrees Fahrenheit and warns users, “Do not use this tool as a hair dryer”.
As long as companies need to cover themselves from any lawsuits, like in the quote above, and as long as simple labels can be lost in translation (like the label on a Korean kitchen knife: “Warning: keep out of children”) – we will have stupid (but funny) warning labels. I’ll finish off with this absolutely ludicrous label that was found on an infant's bathtub:
”Do not throw baby out with bath water."
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Comment by Ragin Cajun
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Comment by KylieW
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I have also seen a warning label on hair dye that says not to eat the dye. Which was handy, cos I was just about to pour it over my icecream as a new kind of topping when I read the label. Whew, just in time!!!