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Fat Bastard on The Zone Diet

September 27th 2006 00:24
Fat Bastard (of Austin Powers): "Do ya have tae call me fat? I tried going on a diet ye know. The zone, ye know 'Carbs are the enemy.' But the portions were so wee I ate the delivery man."

How funny is Mike Myers? This guy is just so talented. In the three Austin Powers movies he plays Austin Powers, Dr Evil, Fat Bastard, Johann van der Smut, (Goldmember) – and all very hilariously.

The Scottish Fat Bastard supposedly weighs one metric tonne. A big joke in the film is the fact that Fat Bastard enjoys eating babies (which is realistically pretty gross, but since this film is a comedy it ends up being an hilarious trait to have). He once tried to refuse payment from Dr Evil (who he works for) in exchange for eating Mini-Me. "I'm bigger than you, I'm higher on the food chain! Get in ma belly!"

Gross. Fat Bastard in his sagging, oily skin...

Some other funny Fat Bastard quotes:

• "First things first! Where's yer shitter? I got a turtle head poking out", "I'm not kiddin'; I got a crap on deck that could choke a donkey. Ooooh, it's squidgy! Ach, Christ, I'm gettin' all emotional from it." – pure genius here from Mike Myers. He just goes so far…

• "Jesus Christ! He's tiny! I've had bigger chunks of corn in my crap!" (Probably referring to Mini-Me.

• "Argghh, this diaper's makin' my nuts rub together! It's gonna start a fire!"


• "Oh, I'd like to have a go wid that broad! Oh, honey, do you find me sexy? Ohhhhh, look at ma titties!"

This guy just lives off being disgusting. He lacks any sort of tact, hygiene or grace. I think Mike Myers did a ripper job with this character, and I wish we could see more of the grotesque Fat Bastard, in an Austin Powers IV perhaps?


Image from Wikipedia
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